How To Dominate Your City In 10 Easy Steps

This one is for people with meager network

Thought Catalog


1. Make friends with at least one bartender at each of your top 3 favorite bars.

This will make you feel cooler. Feeling cooler helps you make friends. Enjoy the rush of being popular.

2. Have a contact at every nice restaurant within a 10 mile radius of your apartment/house.

This has two benefits: 1) Great Service. 2) If you need to get out of a bad date, you can signal your restaurant agent to come over and say “Excuse me. Ms./Mr. *BlahBlah*, your friend/aunt/cousin/uncle/grandma/sibling/emergencycontact/roommate has called the restaurant three times trying to get ahold of you because they knew you wouldn’t be paying attention to your phone on a date.” Duh. You are a crazy polite person. This allows you to leave for approximately 5 minutes and come back with “I am so sorry to do this, but I have to go.” Leave them money. It’s the nice…

View original post 425 more words



Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s